Week 7 NFL Picks
I'm doing pretty well, huh? But who cares. Nothing tops Monday night. On to the madness...
Home team in CAPS
Carolina +3.5 over CINCINNATTI
Bengals showed a few chinks in the armor losing to an under-staffed Tampa team last week. Steve Smith is a ruthless bastard who should be tested for steroids every three hours.
NEW YORK JETS -3 over Detroit
Who are these rapscallion New York Jets? They're downright irrepressible. I love 'em. Let's get these guys to the mother-f-ing playoffs. Detroit got their first win last week but the Tigers winning the Series is the only good news coming out of Motown this fall.
Green Bay +4.5 over MIAMI
I'm surprised some idiot TV producer didn't put this game on Sunday Night Football. It's kinda sexy on paper but a complete stinker in reality.
Jacksonville -9 over HOUSTON
UNCLE DAVE'S STINK-FREE DIAPER PICK OF THE WEEK
Houston got housed by the insane Dallas Cowboys last Sunday. That is a bad sign. What do the Texans have? No running backs and a number one pick with one sack. Jags are coming off a bye week. They're d-line should dominate up front.
BUFFALO +5 over New England
This one looks easy the other way, right? Exactly. I am so smart.
TAMPA BAY +5 over Philadelphia
Bucs seem to have a little something with this Gradowski guy. Although with a name like that he should be selling Kielbasa on Cicero. Philly can win this game but since Simms went down Tampa's had a real stingy D.
ATLANTA +3 over Pittsburgh
Atlanta loses a tough game at home to the respectable New York Giants. A strugg-a-ling Pittsburgh crushes what seems to be a bad Kansas City team playing their second road game in a row. And the Steelers are favored on the road against the best rushing offense in the NFL? This is almost a Stink-free but that might jinx it. Or maybe I just did.
San Diego -4.5 over KANSAS CITY
Chargers offense can do it all. Or at least they could last week against the Niners. KC's coming off that Pittsburgh whooping and having to face LT, Shawn Merriman and the like is not much of a homecoming.
CLEVELAND +6 over Denver
You don't just walk into Cleveland and come out with an easy W. You just don't!
Arizona -3 over OAKLAND
I love this Raiders team. Also, screw the Cardinals. I don't feel bad for them at all. They blew it. Get on with your life.
SEATTLE -7 over Minnesota
Seahawks at home against a mediocre conference opponent? Didn't they just go to the Super Bowl? Who's doing the scheduling up in this piece?
Washington +9 over INDIANAPOLIS
Redskins are a real Jekyll and Hyde team. Last week they were Hyde, losing to the Titans. They'll bounce back and the Colts seem to take their opponents a little too lightly at home.
New York Giants +3 over DALLAS
I went against the Giants last week. Mistake. All is well in big D because T.O. caught three crappy touchdown passes from Bledsoe. I figure they have a letdown. But what the hell do I know?
Last week: 8-5
Uncle Dave's Stink-Free Diaper Picks of the Week: 2-5
Overall: 47-37-2
Home team in CAPS
Carolina +3.5 over CINCINNATTI
Bengals showed a few chinks in the armor losing to an under-staffed Tampa team last week. Steve Smith is a ruthless bastard who should be tested for steroids every three hours.
NEW YORK JETS -3 over Detroit
Who are these rapscallion New York Jets? They're downright irrepressible. I love 'em. Let's get these guys to the mother-f-ing playoffs. Detroit got their first win last week but the Tigers winning the Series is the only good news coming out of Motown this fall.
Green Bay +4.5 over MIAMI
I'm surprised some idiot TV producer didn't put this game on Sunday Night Football. It's kinda sexy on paper but a complete stinker in reality.
Jacksonville -9 over HOUSTON
UNCLE DAVE'S STINK-FREE DIAPER PICK OF THE WEEK
Houston got housed by the insane Dallas Cowboys last Sunday. That is a bad sign. What do the Texans have? No running backs and a number one pick with one sack. Jags are coming off a bye week. They're d-line should dominate up front.
BUFFALO +5 over New England
This one looks easy the other way, right? Exactly. I am so smart.
TAMPA BAY +5 over Philadelphia
Bucs seem to have a little something with this Gradowski guy. Although with a name like that he should be selling Kielbasa on Cicero. Philly can win this game but since Simms went down Tampa's had a real stingy D.
ATLANTA +3 over Pittsburgh
Atlanta loses a tough game at home to the respectable New York Giants. A strugg-a-ling Pittsburgh crushes what seems to be a bad Kansas City team playing their second road game in a row. And the Steelers are favored on the road against the best rushing offense in the NFL? This is almost a Stink-free but that might jinx it. Or maybe I just did.
San Diego -4.5 over KANSAS CITY
Chargers offense can do it all. Or at least they could last week against the Niners. KC's coming off that Pittsburgh whooping and having to face LT, Shawn Merriman and the like is not much of a homecoming.
CLEVELAND +6 over Denver
You don't just walk into Cleveland and come out with an easy W. You just don't!
Arizona -3 over OAKLAND
I love this Raiders team. Also, screw the Cardinals. I don't feel bad for them at all. They blew it. Get on with your life.
SEATTLE -7 over Minnesota
Seahawks at home against a mediocre conference opponent? Didn't they just go to the Super Bowl? Who's doing the scheduling up in this piece?
Washington +9 over INDIANAPOLIS
Redskins are a real Jekyll and Hyde team. Last week they were Hyde, losing to the Titans. They'll bounce back and the Colts seem to take their opponents a little too lightly at home.
New York Giants +3 over DALLAS
I went against the Giants last week. Mistake. All is well in big D because T.O. caught three crappy touchdown passes from Bledsoe. I figure they have a letdown. But what the hell do I know?
Last week: 8-5
Uncle Dave's Stink-Free Diaper Picks of the Week: 2-5
Overall: 47-37-2
posted by David Stassen at 3:51 PM
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